Wednesday, August 15, 2012

Facebook Rules.

I am going to post on missions soon, I promise. My internet has been out at home so any post I do is quick and done at work (where blogger won't seem to let me upload pictures)  We now have our internet set up, so look for a couple good posts coming up :)

Today, I am honoring a request from Kayla to create some facebook ettiquite rules since I did a brief post a couple years ago...And keep in mind that I have broken some of these myself! And, I am sure everyones fb rules would be different BUT THESE ARE THE RULES I WOULD SUGGEST.

1.  Passive Aggressive statuses.  Just don't do them. Usually you post a status like this because everyone will know who you are referring to (even without saying a name).  Or, at very least, the person you are referring to will no.  You are old enough to just address this problem in person or over the phone.  No need to publically (although you claim, not so publically) call them out.  This method backfires and reflects worse on you than it does on them!  Also passive aggressive moves like this don't actually make the other person sorry, just annoyed.

2. I love my BF/My husband is amazing posts.  I'll give a little grace here.  The occassional "look at the flowers hubby brought home" or "I love my fiance so much! One week til we are married" posts are fine.  But, you all know what I am talking about...some people want to tell you how in love they are every day. It's annoying and actually makes me question how legit your relationship is if you feel the constant need to announce your feelings publically.  Are you trying to convince me of your commitment and love? or are you trying to convince your significant other and possibly yourself?

3.  Workout statuses/food statues.  I'll admit, I occasionally do this one. (guilty)  If I run a half marathon or something, I'll post about it. But, I certainly don't tell everyone about my daily workouts and diet habits.  My sister and I get so cracked up about this.

4. The "inspirational" status.  I love when people put a good quote that encourages me.  I may even like it or comment, but when you write a status thats all philosophical (yet not really) and is your own words, I just laugh usually.  I suppose this could be done well if you are elequent, but I've only seen it done in a way that you could tell the person thought they were being deep but no one else felt the same.

5. EXCESSIVE Wedding statuses.  I'll give some grace here.  A countdown the month before your wedding, a few exciting updates like "mailed the invites!" etc, are fun.  But, I have friends who update you with every vender they book and have counted down for 18 months.  It's a little ridiculous. MODERATION is key folks.

6. Centimeters Dialated.  There is absolutely NO REASON to post this on facebook.  You can text your friends your birthing progress, but on facebook, all you have to say is "at the hospital, making progress, baby should be here soon."  I know birth is natural, but its like mamma to bes forget that they are talking about their lady parts.  It's just a little too detailed for 1200 friends to see.

7. Wedding picture profile pics.  I love seeing peoples wedding pics on facebook...but there's a timeline. Did you get married 7 years ago, gain 30 pounds and have 2 kids? Thats not what you look like anymore. Post a wedding pic for your anniversary, etc, but all the time is unncessary.

8. What do I do about my kids diarrhea? statues.    Sometimes, young moms ask very personal things about their children in facebook statuses....I'm sure other people ask personal things in statuses too, I just usually only notice the moms because its almost always about poop or booty rashes. Totally a question that young moms probably need to ask. Therefore, text your friends, send an email, but discussion on facebook, not necessary.

9. Ask me whats wrong statuses.  Y'all know what I am talking about....someone posts a status saying "life sucks, I just can't trust anyone."  This is inviting the question: what's wrong? are you ok?  The response is either annoyance that you asked and being informed that its private info for a select few OR its spilling their guts in a followup comment.

10. Angry Rants.  Sometimes people just rant.  They aren't passive aggresive about it or secretive so you will ask whats wrong, they just put it out there.  Not only will you possibly regret this when you calm down, if its about children or divorce (this is often where I see these rants occuring), as a lawyer, I will tell you things written on the internet that can be printed certainly won't help your case (although they won't always hurt it)

11.  Posting every single story about your child.  I LOVE children stories. If its funny, I will likely comment and laugh really hard at my desk. BUT if you tell me everytime your child drinks milk, I will roll my eyes.  Sometimes kids are HILARIOUS. Sometimes they just are doing normal things which MAY be adorable to you, but normal to the rest of us.

12.  Telling me how many days/weeks/seconds you've been married.  This is cute when you say "1 month of marriage" or "6 months of marriage' or "2 years of marriage" but when you tell me you've been married for 17 weeks or 27 months or 14 months 2 weeks 3 days, you're being a little over the top.

13. Negative Nancy statuses.  Everyone has a "whew, this has been a hard week, glad its over" post...but when everything in your life sucks and you tell me constantly, I start to believe that the only thing that sucks is your attitude.

14. POINTLESS statuses.  You went to Kroger? really. congrats.

15. Overly detailed statues.  You went to Kroger, played Tennis, watched a movie, cleaned your room and ironed your clothes?? congrats again.  (I know I've been guilty of this oops)

16. SPOILERS.  Don't tell me who won the female gymnastics all around meet at the Olympics. Please.


  1. Just for the record, I worked out this morning (you know, the 954th morning of married life) before eating a banana smoothie with 300 calories in it. Then Jack woke up with a disgusting diaper full of green poop (any advice, mothers? should I call his pediatrician?). I went to work--it was just can NOT trust some people. But life will go on. And I get to see the LOVE of my life tonight. Kind of reminds me of the day my mucous plug fell out and I was 15 cms dilated, you know?

  2. I haven't laughed so hard at work in a while...thanks Marley for the response too! Love this!!

  3. haha, omg I love this and totally agree with ALL of it!!

  4. Thanks for delivering such a great post! Now, if all of my Facebook friends would just read and apply it that would be great! Marley's comment is HILARIOUS!!!!