A month of THANKFULNESS

Today ends my month of Thankfulness-- although truthfully I am trying to work on thankfulness full-time.  I participated in that cheesy "what I am thankful for each day" daily status on facebook.  It may be silly, but it did make me pause to think each day about what I should be thankful for...and usually I had a hard time picking out one thing to say I was thankful for.  I truly am blessed in many ways, trials and all.  Before jumping into advent (a time of anticipation and hope and longing) , I thought I would share some quotes on gratefulness.

As someone who has been through my fair share of dark nights, I am grateful that God not only allows hard times to end, but also that He uses those times for good.  Long nights really can become mornings! Also I have sweet sweet friends that have become family and likes that have become love :)

So many blessings, do I thank HIM often enough?

This makes me want to thank God everyday for what I have!

Atleast the glass isn't empty!

Spend more time counting the good things, not the bad. I am still working on this.  It doesn't take away the pain of the bad but it does remind you life is not all bad!

scriptural truth

Do you ever stop to think that God has blessings coming your way.  A couple years ago, I started thanking God for answering prayers before He answered them -- I wanted to be thankful that He was already at work in my circumstances to bring good for me and glory for Him!

Its true that the most grateful people are the happiest!

Maybe God allows hard things or times of waiting because what we want when we want it would actually end up hurting us more.  Did a relationship fall apart or you didn't get the job you want? Maybe God is protecting us and if we understood that, we would be more grateful!

so much more!

We have an entitlement problem in America which is also tied to a lack of gratitude!

Let's strive to make our month of thankfulness into a life of thankfulness -- whether it be verbally or loudly or simply by trusting God during the hard times with a quiet thankfulness

1000 gifts: 201-230

I haven't counted my blessings in awhile, so picking up with #201!

201: health
202: Weeknights in with Dave, dinner and TV
203: my part time job
204: Christmas carols
205: warm coats, gloves and mittens
206: Mississippi winters - not as cold as elsewhere!
207: reading the right Bible verse or quote at the Right time
208: sugar cookies with sprinkles!
209: chili
210: sequin skirts/dresses!
212: baby clothes (is there anything more adorable?)
213: finding the perfect Christmas gift
214: finding a great gift on sale!
215: Christmas cards in the mail!
216: ADVENT!
217: ADVENT articles and books!
218: going to bed early
219: people who love you with actions, not just words
220: made for tv Christmas movies
221: real apologies
222: pretty china and glassware
223: Forehead kisses
224: knowing someone is praying for you
225: thankyou notes
226: kind emails and letters
227: pinterest!
228: sunday school
229: peppermint kisses (by hersheys- so good!)
230: ornaments!

SO MANY SMALL BLESSINGS TO BE THANKFUL FOR. WHAT ARE YOU THANKFUL FOR TODAY?

What I'm loving Wednesday

1. This picture I stole from another blogger....

Isn't this so true? How just being with the right person or right people feels like paradise sometimes?  Whether its your family gathered for a baptism, holiday, tailgate, etc, a girls wine night on the front porch, or curling up with a special guy to eat spaghetti and watch tv, everyday life is just so exciting sometimes, even when it's not.

2. These wine glasses...perfect for the grove or any other outdoor event! (actually not perfect for the grove since everything has to be in solo cups, etc where you can't see the alcohol) I NEED ONE!

3. BELHAVEN SINGING CHRISTMAS TREE this weekend.  My house is right across from a small university that does an outdoor singing Christmas Tree. People bring blankets and cocoa and snacks and curl up on the soccer field and and listen to the tree. (It was my parent's first date 31 years ago!) We can see it from our front porch so every year we host a party.  Sadly, I rarely get to sit and listen to the tree because I am busy hosting, BUT I still love it because it's the first big party of the season and such a fun event with food, music and hot toddies! Plus I have an amazing skirt I plan on wearing :)

4. Our "poor girl" decorations.  Money is tight at our house, but gathered our decorations, accepted donations of old decorations from our parents and bought a few more.  Usually we go way out, but this year we decided decorations and the party would be lower key....I still think we did a decent job on our house.  Clearly this is not 'Southern Living' quality but it is pretty festive....



My mom's old stockings were hung by our chimney with care...



Our skinny Charlie Brown Christmas Tree... 15 prelit :)

5. CHRISTMAS MOVIES.  I have already watched 3.  Thank goodness for DVR. I set them to record a lot of movies then I watch as many as I can while cleaning, wrapping gifts, etc.  I hope I can see a good number of movies this year but with my weekend job, I may not.  Still glad to see a few.  Here are some links to the holiday movies: TV GUIDE  Holiday pages  25 days of Christmas and this one is the best: CHRISTMAS TV SCHEDULE

6. THIS BLOG: Single, Party of One.

7. Christmas shopping ahead of time.  I've gotten half of it done.  Trying to finish up in the next couple of months so I can not stress and enjoy the holidays.  Getting Dave' family done first because I don't know them as well as my own, obviously.  I can easilly find my sister something last minute but it takes more time to figure out what they want.  Luckilly I work at a store with great products and a discount so lots of my shopping will be done there :)

8. KRAFT FRESH TAKES.  Have yall tried these? They cost maybe 3 dollars, though I keep getting them when they are on sale. Its various cheese and breadcrumb mixes that you put on chicken, pork, etc.  I add the mix to chicken and its so simple, saves me from making a fancy meal but also saves me from eating plain chicken! 

9. SCANDAL. Seriously, watch this show. Its only on season 2 so between netflix, ABC and HULU, you can catch up!

10. ADVENT.  For those of you who have read my blog for awhile, you know I love advent.  I love Christmas and the holiday season in genereal (who doesn't?) but I LOVE advent.  I bought a mini advent devotional (1.00) and a book about advent (2.00) at Lifeway Bookstores on Black Friday. (TO READ MY ADVENT POSTS FROM LAST YEAR, CLICK ON THE ADVENT CATEGORY)

Every 20something Single Gal should have...the grand finale!

FINALLY, I am finishing up my series on "What Every 20 something Single Gal should have..."

#28 A SCHEDULE AND ROUTINE THAT ALLOWS SOME DOWN TIME.

Singles have a little more freedom - to travel, be spontaneous, stay up late, go to parties. We don't have to schedule couple time or consider our partner's needs or get a babysitter.  And that's good because (a) we need to meet men, we need to be out and about at all the holiday parties, church get togethers and tailgates that we get invited to; and (b) its one of the pluses of singleness that you can and do get to go to, enjoy, and experiance a lot.  Even on the days where I have hated singleness, I must admit that this is a perk. :)

However, always being busy is exhausting.  And there is a pressure to go go go because what if you miss the most fun party of the year or what if you miss the party where your future husband is. GOODNESS! One of the things I look forward to when I date someone is having more of a schedule, and having a schedule that allows me time to stay in and rest!

Do yourself a favor. Plan well, make a schedule.  Go to tons of parties, but KNOW when you need a night in... or when you need to get laundry done. If you have a good schedule, you can plan ahead for a busy weekend full of get togethers and parties because you rested up and did laundry the week before.

ALSO give yourself some routine.  Pick a show you watch every week, read for 30 min for bed, do yoga every morning, etc.  Routines allow you to feel a little more in control of life.

#29 THE ABILITY TO FAKE IT TIL YOU MAKE IT.

Although you know I believe in being honest about the struggles of singleness while in dialogue, I do believe that you should walk through life without letting singleness hold you back. Walk through your single days like you feel very confident, even on the moments you don't.  Don't feel like sitting alone at church when your best friend is out of town? Just dig down deep and do it.  Don't want to go another family holiday event alone? Suck it up and get through the day.  Don't want to have to answer one more question on your singleness? Buck up and do it.  

SINGLENESS requires a confidence and nerve.  You learn to walk into parties, church, events alone.  You learn to field questions about your dating life.  You field off rude comments about how you will understand when you're married.  SINGLENESS causes you to crumble or dig down deep, have a little confidence and learn to be polite but firm and independent.  Although most moments of your single life may be grand, there will be a time when you may walk into that party feeling 100 percent alone, but put on a smile and fake it til you make it. Seem like the independent confident womean that you don't feel like.

#30 A SET OF TOOLS AND OTHER "MANLY" SKILLS

Face it, you don't have a built-in handy man, so you have three options: learn to do some manly things yourself, make some good male friends (and trade the cookies and other baked goods for their help moving or fixing your sink) or make enough money to call an expect.  LIKELY, you will do a combination of all 3.  But start with some tools and the ability to kill a roach without screaming ;)

#31 A GRACIOUS DEMEANOR

Being single is tough sometimes -- as I've mentioned, you've got to fake confidence sometimes, learn manly skills, live in hope but prepare for permenant singleness should that be the case, develop your own traditions, meals, households, etc.  And you WILL screw up sometimes, probably a lot if you are like me, so have a little grace with yourself - and others.  I think a plus of getting married later is that your personality and expectations have a chance to soften. You don't walk into marriage and motherhood expecting them to be easy because you've lived a little more life by the time you've gotten married, and because unfortunately you've seen friends struggle through unhappy marriages and difficult children.  So, you know that life must be taken with a grain of salt and with plenty of grace because people let you down and you fail.

So, above all, have a little grace in your 20s.  You will faill at dating. You will fail at family.  You will fail at work. You will fail with friends.  BUT you will also have some successes and lots of growth.

Thankfulness = Trusting

I love this post on Fast Pray's blog.  It discusses how to be thankful in times of singleness, divorce, death, loss during the holiday season.  I love what the author says in these two paragraphs, particularly the last sentence about thankfulness being an act of surrender, trust and worship.

"It is so easy to offer our praise and thanks to God when things are good in our lives, basically when we feel thankful. But what I constantly have to remind myself of is that thankfulness isn’t simply a feeling that comes from good things happening. It’s an orienting of the heart that, as we practice it, re-focuses our attention away from painful circumstances and back on Jesus, strengthening our awareness of His consistent presence which is necessary if we’re to endure the many things life throws at us on a regular basis. It is indeed a practice, and one that might not initially match where our hearts are. It can seem inauthentic, as though we’re denying our true feelings or suffering.

As is usually case, the way in which God calls us to follow Him is radically different than what feels natural in this world. I can honestly say I never want to give thanks for the pain in my life. And yet on the occasions I try, I notice that something very subtle shifts inside of me. It’s like a small chasm of space opens up and gives God more room to take up residence with the pain and do the work in my life He’s after. In these instances thankfulness takes on a very different definition, becoming an act of surrender, trust, and worship rather than simply a response to circumstances."

I'll be honest.  This year, despite a lot of loss in our family, I've also got tons to be grateful for, so its less of a struggle (than it has been in the past) to thank God for the good things in my life like family, friends, job and Dave.  BUT I have had those years where thankfulness was incredibly hard - after breakups, broken engagements, in the middle of law school finals when the economy looks so gloomy that it seems I won't find a job, when I was single yet again, etc.  Sometimes I have failed at thankfulness and sometimes I have truly been thankful despite my circumstances.  And some years I have failed and succeeded (women are fickle after all, so my feelings change through the season or even the day ha!)

And sometimes others probably thought I was failing when thankfulness didn't sound like loud jubilant praises.... because some years, thankfulness is exactly what the author said: "an act of surrender, trust, and worship rather than simply a response to circumstances."  Some years, thankfulness is putting one foot in front of the other and continuing to move forward, admitting that your circumstances are hard, but thanking the Lord that He is with you and has plans for you.  Sometimes thankfulness is saying Lord I trust and will surrender.  For me, thankfulness was often giving myself 30 min or an hour to be upset and pray about the situation, then accepting the situation for what it was and moving on to spend the rest of the Holiday celebrating and worshiping.  Afterall, Christmas is not about my marital statuts, my job status, my issues with family or friends; it is about my Savior's birth and the hope that brought and stilll brings.  Likewise, thanksgiving is not about what I don't have, but about the many many times God has been faithful throughout the years. That is something to celebrate despite all my circumstances! 

And despite the difficulties in my life, I have always found such HOPE in the holidays. So many people have hard holidays ahead.  My heart breaks for friends that will be facing this holiday season after the loss of loved ones, divorce, pain, etc.  But I am encouraged to know that in their quiet, "fought for" thankfulness and trust, God can provide HOPE!

Thanksgiving/Apple Cream Pie

I hope everyone had a good thanksgiving. I sure did.  It has been a long hard year in many ways, but it has also been a year full of blessings -- family, friends, Dave, a stable job, and most importantly, a God who is faithful to us when others aren't and when we are undeserving, a God who blesses us with good things and carries us through tough times.

Dave's family does Thanksgiving lunch and mine does dinner so we were able to spend the holiday together and experience eachother's traditions.  I drove to Dave's hometown Wednesday after work and spent the evening with his family and woke up early Thursday to hunt -- okay, to sit with Dave while he hunted.  We didn't see anything -- too hot for deer...but dave got a buck and several ducks later in the week.

Hunting with my cutie

Then we went back to his parents house and watched some of the parade, ate breakfast and got our dishes ready to head to his grandparent's house where we had a big delicious lunch.  My contributions were a salad and an Apple Cream Pie.

Apple Cream Pie

APPLE CREAM PIE RECIPE:

INGREDIENTS
4 eggs
2 cans apple pie filling
2 1/2 C sugar
1/2 C milk
8 T flour
4 T butter
1/2 t salt
2 t vanilla
Cool whip

Beat eggs until light and fluffy add everything but vanilla cook over low heat until thick stirring constantly. Add vanilla. Let cool. Pour into cooked pastry shell. Top with cool whip
Makes 2 pies

Its best to mix flour and sugar together before adding to milk egg mixture so flour doesn't clump

After lunch, we headed to my family's house for dinner and tree decorating.  We also had a good time "planning" our black friday shopping, although none of us got up early, but we looked through the paper for all the deals!

Jack and I snuck a taste of apple cream pie (made one for my family too)...

Shhhh Don't tell!

YUMMMMMM.....

My family has two trees- a formal tree in the living room and a family tree in the den. Here is the formal tree....

The Formal Tree

Dave and me in front of the formal tree

Decorating the family tree....

Ansley

Marley

Then I spent the rest of the weekend working at my holiday job, buying a few gifts and decorating my house for our upcoming Christmas Party.  When Dave came back to Jackson, we cooked dinner and watched a CHristmas movie on TV: Home Alone 5.  It was okay for a tv movie, but seriously, can you beat the original 2 from the 90s?? Our generation's Home Alone was the best.  Actually, our generations's holiday movies in general are way better than the recent ones: Home Alone, Santa Clause,  All I want for Christmas, Christmas Vacation, etc. I saw a commercial for a Christmas movie about a dog: Christmas Paws....Seriously???? Stick to the classics and by classics I mean old school black and white or 80s/90s classics.

Sweet Potato Pie

Last night I cooked a couple pies for Thanksgiving festivities.  This sweet potato pie is for the office Thanksgiving day spread in the breakroom today.  (My mom is making one for thursday too though)  Sweet Potato Pie is a great alternative to Pumpkin Pie if you want a change but still want something fall-ish.  I also made an apple cream pie which I will share in a different post!

(1) Preheat oven to 350

(2)You will need to mix together:

• 2 c of boiled mashed sweet potatoes (2 c of canned sweet potatos, unsweetened will work too!)
• 1 c sugar
• 1/2 c butter
• 2 eggs
• 1/2 c milk
• 1 t vanilla
• 1 c grated coconut

(3) Pour into a pie crust (use your own recipe or buy one in the frozen foods section and roll it out)

(4) Bake at 350 degrees for 45 minutes (my pie took around 55 minutes though so check and see if you need to add time)

#27 The ability (and freedom) to say NO

#27 Every 20something single gal needs the ability and freedom to say NO.

You hear this said a lot regarding moms.  You don't have to say yes to every ministry opportunity because your ministry opportunity is at home.  You're so busy you don't need to overcommit.  Your primary focus should be your kids and husband.  Don't overexert yourself so much that you don't have time for your family.

All good advice.  and true: mommies should not overcommit (actually ALL people should not overcommit) But the message to singles is usually quite the opposite.  Singles are portrayed as having so much time.  They can fully invest in youth group and making meals and volunteering. In fact, if singles enjoy their time, they are often presented as being selfish and self focused.

But, the truth is (and I have learned this the hard way) -- YOU need time for you.  So pick a couple of things to say yes to and say no to the rest.  Single women have jobs.  Single women have to be social -- this is not an option if you want to possibly meet someone.  Single women have relationships they pour into like friends, families, boyfriends, etc.  So, sometimes, single women have more time, but sometimes they don't.

The truth is all people should minister to others -- just no person or group can do it all!!!  So, don't be made to feel like you're single so you have all the time in the world. Pick a couple things and do it well. And say NO and don't feel guilty about saying NO.  You need time to start a family too which means you need time to meet people and be social and date.  Even if you stay single, you need time for you and for work and life! So, say no...the first time is hard, but then its more freeing.  And, pour yourself into the activities and volunteer opportunities you say yes to!

Every 20something gal needs #25-26

#25  Every 20something single gal needs a quality purse and an evening clutch.

Once again, I did this series for the "single gal" but truth is, it applies to all 20something gals.  Gone are the days of carrying around a purse from target.  It's time to invest in a quality piece.  This doesn't have to be designer but should be a solid and preferably a neutral (if you only invest in one purse)  There is a time for FUN CHEAP PURSES but when you are going to an interview or business meeting, you need something nicer. If you have a decdent outfit but throw on a cheap looking purse, your look drops a couple notches in quality.

Some tips:

• look for designer brands at tj maxx or look when belk, macys, etc is having a sale
• if you can only invest in a brown or black purse, decide which color based on which color you wear more
• look at outlets
• sign up for the emails from kate spady, tory burch, etc and get notifications of their sales.
• if you are a mom or work, make sure its large enough to throw a couple essentials in -- a diaper and bottle, a notepad and file, etc  Although you will likely have a brief case or diaper bag, there are those short trips somewhere where you may just want to carry a purse.
• you can find a quality purse that isn't a hot designer

Now your clutch/formal purse doesn't have to be expensive.  But you do need a bag or two that you can carry in the evening that can contain your phone cash, license and a lipstick and mascara.  Although I have a couple Tory evening purses I would LOVE to have, I think you should first invest your money in a solid brown or bag purse. CHEAP IS OK and this is all the more reason to buy an evening bag...you can get one at steinmart or a cheap boutique for under 30 and you will look complete and ready for the party in no time.

#26 Every 20something single gal needs accountability.

One of the best things about marriage is that it's an easy way to have iron sharpening iron as the Bible says....someone is encouraging you to grow and change and calling you out on things you could change on.  As a single, thats harder to find.  Build friendships with people who will answer you truthfully - "Yes you are being too picky about who you date"  Friendships with people who will ask how your goals are going -- "hows running going?  Did you learn to sew like you wanted to?"  Have friendships with people who will here your flaws and correct you but still love you - "Ok, letting him stay over that late wasn't wise, but we all make mistakes and its time to forgive yourself and move on."

Also, join groups.  I did that with running...I knew without accountability of a group, I wouldn't go.  Thats why I think its important (for many reasons) to join a Sunday School class.  I could easilly skip church because its inconveniant or I don't want to sit alone, etc, but I know too many people who will ask where I have been.

Also, stay close with your family.  It's likely that they feel the freedom to call you out in ways others don't

Red Carpet Pics

Here are the Red Carpet Pics from Mistletoe Preview Party.....Can you tell that the last one (of all 4 of us) is at the end of the night when we were leaving ?? My hair is a mess after dancing!

Fun pictures of Sweet friends and a sweet boy!   The four of us made it til the very end.  Actually, I am pretty sure that Claire and I have closed Mistletoe Preview Party down 3 years in a row! Now I am off to have a fun afternoon of laundry, folding and my online hunting course!

Low Carb Peanut Butter Cookies

I am trying to eat semi low carb but tonight I was craving something sweet. I discovered this recipe online.

Not as good as a gourmet dessert, but not too bad.  I love PB though, so anything made with PB wins me over.  (FYI I love PB so much that I do not keep it in the house.  There have been weeks where I eat an entire jar bc I have a couple spoonfuls a day...NOT OK)

You will need:

• Natural PB
• Splenda
• Vanilla
• Salt
• egg

Directions:

1. preheat oven to 350
2. Mix 1 c. PB, 1 c. Splenda, 1 tsp Vanilla, 1 egg, and a dash of salt together in a bowl
3. Spoon balls of the dough onto the lightly greased cookie sheets.
4. Press a fork on top of each ball.
5. Bake for approx 10 minutes.  I just watched them to know when.

I had two tonight. They were pretty good! I did the math and for 13 cookies (which is the number of cookies I made), each cookie was 108 calories and between 2 and 2.5 net carbs! If you are craving something sweet, give it a try !!

Weekend

Hey Y'all!! I promise I am finish my 31 things series next week (really, raise your hand if you are suprised that it took me more than a month to finish that?? No hands? I thought so. Life gets busy !!)  Until then, here's a few weekend notes:

Tonight we are having a girls night and I am excited. I feel like this fall has been crazy for everyone -- people are busy with work, with familiy obligations, with personal struggles, with boyfriends, husbands, etc etc...oh, and football...I see a lot of my friends less during football season due to the fact that we "go our separate ways" on Saturdays :)  So yay for sushi, wine and chatting!

Tomorrow I have training for my HOLIDAY job I mentioned....I am working at The Everyday Gourmet, a cooking/china store here in Jackson that also does bridal registries.  I am excited to do something fun, work hard and make a little extra Christmas cash.

Afterwards, Dave and I are cooking Chili and flipping between 3 games (Ole Miss v. Vandy, Auburn v. Georgia, and MSU v. LSU)  Why did our 3 schools have to play at around the same time?  This fall has been super busy and I have attended far less games than I normally do, but curling up in sweats on a cold night (well maybe cold night since its Mississippi!) with Chilli sounds wonderful.  And, strangely enough, I haven't missed my usual obsession with football that much.  I've had good and bad distractions which has reminded me its just football....although don't get me wrong, I can't wait to be obsessed (to a lesser degree) next year again !!

Also, who gets excited about having a little free time to tidy up and do laundry? THIS GIRL. That, plus Dave and I have free coupons for Zaxbys (love their salads!!) so clearly, as you can all see I have BIG plans for the wkd!! Work, laundry, tv, zaxbys!!

We are starting to pull out our Christmas decorations this weekend at the Peachtree House.  My roomies and I throw a big Christmas party the first weekend of December.  I realized that if we don't start pulling out a little each wkd, we will be stressing out the week before.  So, yes, we are those people-- with decorations out early - but its for a good reason!!

That being said, where do you find cheap christmas decorations? Where is the best place to get a cheap articifial prelit tree? (our roomie took ours to DC) and what are some good Christmas crafts? (deep in me is a desire to be crafty, I'm not but I try!)


And finally, here's a little something to make you smile this friday :)

Preview Party

Mistletoe Marketplace is a Christmas Shopping event with 100's of vendors from all over the nation.  The 4 day shopping event is a tradition here in Mississippi. It is put on by the Jr. League of Jackson and is used to raise money for their many charity projects. Along with the shopping, there are several fun events like cocktail hours and parties that you can purchase tickets too....the biggest party being the Preview Party on Wednesday night...with a band, dancing, silent auction, shopping, food, drinks, etc.  This is my 4th year to attend and as always, we had a blast.

I love Mistletoe for many reasons...my mom was one of the steering committe members one year so we all lived and breathed Mistletoe in our household.  That was the first year I got to go to the preview party. I was a Junior in high school and too young to go, but mom let Marley and Me go to the big party because she had worked so hard on Mistletoe.  I felt like such a big deal, ha!  I also love Mistletoe because it officially kicks off the Holiday Season....soon there will be Thanksgiving, Singing Christmas Tree, Tacky Christmas, Mistletoga, Dirty Santa Swap, etc etc.  I love the holidays so I love when it finally begins. Particularly this year....its been a long fall with lots of hard times to friends and family close to me, and it ended with the election Tuesday night (ughh)...I feel like a happy holiday season is much needed...enjoying family and celebrations, remembering our Savior's birth, focusing on blessings.  So WELCOME HOLIDAY SEASON...you are very needed!

Here are some pics from last night!

Me, Lane, Claire, Marianna and the Peachtree House while getting ready

My sweet Dave

Brittany and I at the party

Spence and I were carpool buddies...this is Spence, Dorothy (his better half) and me in the shopping area

Me with Claire and Martha Grace

Marianna, Lane, and Me

My favorite guy and me on the dance floor.

I love love love the Holidays.  And I am so glad to have family and friends nearby this year -- Marley Bech and Jack are back south and nearby and I now have sweet Dave in my life.  Not to mention all my sweet friends to celebrate with.  Many good times to come as we celebrate our Savior and enjoy the holiday spirit!

Every 20somthing single gal ...#22-24

Bear with me as I finish my October Series....in November (oops!)

Every 20something single gal should have....

22. HOPE for Marriage and Family (if thats your goal) but a solid PLAN B if it doesn't happen.

You are in your 20s or your 30s, no reason to give up hope.  I think a lot of people scare singles into thinking you have no chance of marriage past a certain age. But if so many people are still single, is that really true? The age of marriage keeps going up.  Many men and women are left and God is still on HIS THRONE. Live in hope of marriage and family (if you desire those things, you may not and thats fine too!)  And by live in hope, I mean plan like there is marriage in your future.  Get your finances in order (I am trying to do that now), learn to cook, buy a house, dress up and go to events and try to meet new people.  Feel free to go to the marriage seminar at church or read a book on relationships and marriage.  Never think you have to give up.  Enjoy your single days - don't waste them, but plan for marriage and live as if it will happen.  Its fine to have hope and live in that hope.

BUT HAVE A GOOD PLAN B.

Have you thought about how life will be if you don't take the traditional marriage and babies route? DO IT.  Play the scenerio out in your head.  Some people would tell you not to because you might worry about the future too much.  But, really, play it out...and get upset and "mourn" the possibility of a permenantly single adulthood. Now, imagine the best single adulthood possible.

I did this and it was upsetting, but it was also freeing.  PERMENANTLY SINGLE KATY would be the best damn aunt there is (the kind who takes her nieces and nephews on trips!), would travel the world, would go on missions trips, would enjoy holidays with her family but would feel free to do her own thing (just like married folks are free to miss the occasional family event), would never let herself "go" just because she was single, would still date and enjoy life, would host dinner parties, would likely adopt a baby, would be involved in a church home, would move to a cool city, would continue her education, would learn to cook better meals, would run a marathon, would decorate a home.

That's still not the life I planned, but its a DAMN GOOD PLAN B.  So, go ahead, feel free to make a Plan B - just in case, but make it a good Plan B!!  In fact, my plan B is so good that if and when I get married, there will be some aspects of it I miss (and I am sure Baby Jack will miss the trips I had planned on taking him on haha!)

23. Adult relationships with your parents (and siblings).

This will look differently for everyone.  Maybe you have an overinvolved family and you just have to decide that you will respect them but draw boundaries.   Maybe you have a family who wasn't there so you just have to decide to forgive your parents and love them but not trust your heart to them.  At a certain point, you have to establish your own belief system, your own goals and your own life....but this can be done in a way that respects your parents.

Allowing yourself to be manipulated or manipulate, to bully or be bullied, etc is childish and not helpful.  Your parents don't need to control your marriage and family one day so you need to establish your independence now.

(SIDENOTE: I am blessed to have respectful parents, so this isn't a passive aggressive attack on them, just a realization that at some point, we all have to pull away and grow up.  I recently witnessed what happens when this independence never occurs and its sad)

24.  A pretty pair of panties and bra (even if just you see it!) and a pair of spanx.

You're an adult.  Recognize the importance in the proper undergarments.  Have a few pretty pieces and a gurdle or "sucky-in thingy"   I don't care how thin you are, you will occasionally have a dress that shows bulges and needs clean lines.  And I don't care how conservative you are, but having your granny panties stick up out of your jeans isn't going to attract any men, nor will it make you feel very sexy.  So invest in a few young pretty pieces and atleast one adult slimming piece.

Weekend/week update

I know I've been MIA.  I have had a lot of family busyness and have literally NOT stopped for what feels like a week but it's only been a few days. My family has had a rough year and I was glad to be with everyone.  I truly do have the best family out there.  and one of the strongest, anyways I digress...

SO TIRED.  Seriously, last night Dave came over to do some work/watch tv.  I needed to fold clothes.  I think we were trying to have some "calm not busy together time" One basket of clothes done, I feel asleep.  Didn't do the dishes, didn't finish folding the rest of the clothes. fell asleep.  Dave let me lay there and he watched tv and finished his work. THEN LEFT   9 hours of sleep later, I feel SO MUCH BETTER. (Thanks Dave!) 

I have so much to update y'all on....Halloween Party. New Job (ok its a part time seasonal job, but I am still so excited! a fun way to pay for holiday gifts, etc) Race saturday (although I have hardly run all week -- just once with all this busyness! Hopefully I will run today!)

FRIDAY NIGHT, the Peachtree Girls (roomies and I) threw a fun Halloween Party.  I plan on posting about the party soon, but here is one picture to get you through...

Aren't we an adorable rocker couple??

Saturday Dave did not have to go in to the studio for the first time in weeks. I never should have written that post about Sundays being my fav because ever since then, Dave has had tons to do both Saturday and Sundays, and I've been busy too, I jinxed us!  So we planned to spend Saturday doing nothing, and we almost did.  We picked up coffee and watched tv saturday morning while I cleaned up from the party some and made breakfast.  We then met my family to eat lunch and watch the Rebels beat Arkansas (HOTTY TODDY).  It was especially fun with baby Jack in town! Dave and I then went to his cousin's birthday party and finally home.  A couple friends were having cookouts for the big Bama MSU game but we had agreed to be lazy Saturday and had only halfway honored that...so we stayed in, cooked a pizza, watched tv and then watched football when it came on.  I think we both dozed in and out of sleep on the couch.  Being lazy was wonderful!  Especially since sunday it was back to the grind.  Although Sunday Night, I went and saw Taken 2.  VERY GOOD MOVIE.

 Snuggles with my fav boy

 Someone stuck a whole mini cupcake in is mouth, but is there any other way to eat a mini cupcake?

Dave went down the blowup slide at his cousin's birthday party

This week, my family has been in town so we've had a good bit of time with everyone, particularly JACK. 

Jack loves his BIG DAVE

Jack also loves trying to feed himself ice cream!

Dave and I carved pumpkins. Mine failed miserably.   I didn't sketch it out and I should have.  Usually I take a long time trying to plan something great to carve (I did george w. bush one year and I also did the US capitol and war eagle and flowers)  I think I was just so determined that we would squeeze it into a busy week that I didn't plan it out.  I may try again (Yes, I know it's november....) because I was so disspointed by my first attempt! Or maybe I will paint a pumpkin!!

More updates soon, and also, I wil finish my series. Maybe I will do one big final post!  (I love series but then they become so constricting!)